


The dotted dragon of equality

by Big_ball_of_anxiety_and_cake



Series: Sooo, I talked to my sister again... [1]
Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Characters Play Dungeons & Dragons, Crack, Dragons, Drug Use, Gen, How Do I Tag, Might add more tags later, My First Work in This Fandom, Polkadot for president, Weed and wheat, but will propably forget, might not work out, posting this on my phone
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-05
Updated: 2020-09-05
Packaged: 2021-03-07 03:02:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26299858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Big_ball_of_anxiety_and_cake/pseuds/Big_ball_of_anxiety_and_cake
Summary: What if you had a tiny dotted dragon, went to play Dungeons & Dragons with the Way brothers, got high and decided to make the dragon president?That's it. That's the plot.
Relationships: Everyone & dragon, Gerard Way & Mikey Way, Gerard Way & Original Female Character(s), Mikey Way & Original Female Character(s)
Series: Sooo, I talked to my sister again... [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1910908
Comments: 1
Kudos: 1





	The dotted dragon of equality

**Author's Note:**

  * For [walking_contradiction42](https://archiveofourown.org/users/walking_contradiction42/gifts).



> Sooo, I talked to my sister about having a tiny dragon and then somehow Gerard Way came up and this happened.  
> My first fanfiction ever so don't expect too much.

Hi, I’m an MCR fan and I have a dragon. It’s actually not important why. I don’t actually remember anyway. It most definitely does not involve drugs.

(Everybody’s on drugs! The American dream is a killing machine!)

My dragon is white with blue polka dots. His name is polka dots for I think obvious reasons. Now, having a dragon is very exciting. A parrot on your shoulder is considered funny and cute but a dragon makes you awesome. You can walk through dark alleys without fear and always have a convenient lighter at hand. A dragon on your shoulder is the stylishest accessoire you can have!

Oh, right. I forgot to mention that polka dots is not really that big, didn’t I? Well, he’s about the size of a watermelon. It’s kind of cute really. But still awesome! DRAGONS!!!!

His size doesn’t mean I can’t fly with him too. I can’t fly on him but he is still incredibly strong and I can just hold onto his tiny feet and he will lift me up into the air. I just have to be careful not to let go. This doesn’t work for long distances but I don’t want to fly to the United States or something. I just wanna make a cool entrance at the grocery store.

What would I want in the US anyway? It’s not like my favourite singer lives there and would propably fangirl about the dragon enough to let me into his house or something.

Oh, wait.

Needless to say, I did fly to the US hanging onto my dragon. I live in Europe so there was quite a lot of ocean in between and I regretted my decision pretty soon. I blame the six bowls of chocolate frosted sugar bombs I had for breakfast. Definitely not my life decisions.

Somehow we did arrive in California. I don’t know how. I fell asleep. Falling asleep clinging onto a flying dragon for your life might sound crazy but my sugar rush was wearing off. I needed more sugar so I went to a store first and bought a looooot of chocolate. Then I noticed that weed is legal here, so I bought some of that too. Just because. I also bought wheat cause it’s calming and shit.

Then I finally flew to Gerard’s lawn. I made sure to make a really cool entrance with me decending from the sky clinging to polka dots who was spitting fire. Like I said, he isn’t really big and it wasn’t all that impressive but nevermind. Also My fish by the dead mermaids was playing in the background. The level of drama was fitting but the topic might have been a bit off.

"Oh, mighty Gerard!”, I yelled as soon as I had safely landed. "Saviour of the broken the beaten and the damned! I wanna play dungeons and dragons! I brought the dragon can we use your dungeons?”

A figure stumbled out. It was Gerard who was wearing the same green jacket he always wore. He looked very nerdy. His brother Mikey was right behind him. He casually leaned against the door frame and looked very done with the world. Also very emo.

Meanwhile Gerard came stumbling towards me waving his arms excitedly.

"Of course we can!” he yelled back even though we were only like six feet apart.

(cause we’re not gay except we really are)

"I don’t have a dungeon but we can play in my basement. Can I pet your dragon!”

I nodded and stayed really cool while my idol, the emo god, squealed excitedly and started petting polka dots while making smooching sounds. This was the best day of my life already.

"Does he have a name?”, he asked finally while still cooing over how adorable the dragon was.

"Yeah, he is called polka dots.”

"Why polka dots?”

"Cause he has polka dots.”

"Oh, right.”

Awkward silence ensued. Mikey was still being emo in the door frame and Gerard was cuddling the dragon and telling him how the world was ugly but he was beautiful to him.

(MCR references are important. That’s my mantra. Cause all you ever do is chant the same old MANTRA)

"Is he white with blue dots though or is he actually blue and the dots are just his true colour poking through the opressing white of forced conformity?”, Gerard broke the awkward silence.

(Let me go! Go on record be the first to say I’m sorry!)

"I actually don’t know. How would we find out?”

"I suppose we could measure the surface area of the dots and the white to see what’s bigger and pronounce that his true skin colour.”

"That sounds reasonable.”

\-----------------------

,,Why do I have to do this shit all by myself (noone was looking. I was thinking of you) while you too are getting stoned?”, asked Mikey from where he was desperately trying to measure the diameter of one of the dots with just a ruler and a broken calculator. Gerard moved his laserpointer a little further to the left. Polka dots immediately jumped after the colourful moving dot destroying Mikey’s calculations once more. He sighed.

Gerard exhaled a puff of smoke and gestured vaguely to the ceiling.

"We are not getting stoned, we’re just appretiating the weed.”

I laughed. It seemed funny though I could not remember why.

Mikey sighed again and started his measurements over.

\----------------------

A few hours later Gerard and I had long since finished all the weed and moved on to the wheat. I was vaguely aware that this type of wheat was not supposed to be smoked but it was simply too calming.

We were so stoned, I mean wrapped up in appreciating the weed and then the wheat, that Mikey had actually managed to finish his calculations without Gerard always distracting polka dots with his laser pointer. He inhaled sharply when he finally saw the results.

"Guys, this is amazing. The blue polka dots and the white cover exactly the same amount of his surface. His skin coulours are perfectly balanced!”

"Wow, are you sure?!”

He nodded very seriously. Being locked up in a basement with two people smoking weed (and wheat) might have made him a bit stoned too. He held up the calculator.

"The numbers do not lie.”

Something rattled inside the calculator as he moved it. The dark display briefly lit up and showed the equation 16=42. It was obviously full of wisdom.

"Do you even know what that means?”, asked Gerard excitedly. He tried to turn towards us and fell of the couch. He didn’t seem to mind.

"The dragon is a living symbol of equality! Polka dots and white perfectly balanced! This is revolutionary! We should crown him to be or king!”

"The US doesn’t have a king!”, I pointed out. Otherwise that suggestion seemed perfectly logical to me.

"What about president? He could be our president! I would vote for him!”

Gerard gestured wildly with his arms to illustrate his point. I wasn’t sure what excatly his point was but it looked cute so I nodded. One of his arms hit the coffee table and it collapsed. All our snack bowls tumbled to the floor next to Gerard. He tried to catch some of the marshmallows with his mouth but failed.

"There is no law against a dragon being president”, Mikey said. If even the reasonable, emo, but maybe slightly very stoned Mikey fucking Way approved, it had to be a good idea.

We immediatly decided to drive to Washington and start the election campaign for our equality dragon polka dots. Mikey and Gerard had to get their hats first though. They are vampires. That didn’t bother me. Everyone knows that vampires will never hurt you.

(And if the sun comes up will it tear the skin right of my bones?)

Also all emos are vampires. That’s why their eyeliner always looks so smudged. It’s not on purpose they just can’t see themselves in the mirror while applying it so it just gets eyerywhere and they almost poke their eyes out and start crying and that smudges it.  
Nothing out of the ordinary then. Just me and some emo vampires trying to make a dragon called polka dot president.

We never went trough with that plan though. We were driving really slowly cause we were all so stoned and safety first. Then we all fell asleep and drove into a ditch. Nobody got hurt though. We weren’t going fast enough for that.

When we woke up, we had forgotten most of our genious plan from the previous night and what we could remember now seemed like absolute gibberish. So we didn’t drive to Washington. Instead we drove back home and finally played Dungeons and Dragons.

Maybe our dungeon was just a basement and maybe our dragon was a bit small but we had a great time nevertheless.

(am I dressed for the occasion. It’s number 32 now here’s the situation!)

THE END


End file.
